Feel Good

Depression and anxiety … feelings
You can numb them
Or you can live

When you don’t know how to steer your thoughts
To the point that either suicide or terror overcomes you
One must understand that it’s always about your choice
Your choice to think up or to think down

Feels almost like
giving yourself a bone marrow transplant
Not just a skin transplant to get thick skin
But it’s really just more like a brain transplant
only of thought
To take all the trash out of your brain
Everything that ties you to a negative past
Or to a blue future … if you want blue sky

Living in a clouded mind
Gray
Wondering when you’re going to feel the sunshine again
It doesn’t matter what has happened
As much as it matters what you think right now

If you think you can have whatever it is you want
It may not be in the form that you envision it
But the universe will give you love
It will give you joy
Peace
Pleasure
If you seek it
If you don’t resign yourself to live without feelings
Numbed
To protect yourself

You can learn how to ride a bike
And how to swim
To read and to write
And how to smile
How to love
to hope
and dream
Know there is one soul out there
At least
But many others, too
Who are pulling for you
Praying for you
Caring about you
And it doesn’t matter that you don’t know who they are
But that they are

Remember back when you had your fondest memory of you
And sit in it
Lock into it
Stay there … know that is you
And grow from there
Upwards, always upwards
Not looking back at what is gone
Nor forward with false imaginings
For now is the time for realization of all that is good
To accept the good
To see it
To reach for it
And understand that it is always, always there

Nurture it then
Grow it
Watch it
Capture it
Dance around it as it grows even on its own
And then begin to climb
And cling to it as you climb
The good
The good in you
And in others
And in this world

And it will become clear to you that you
You alone
Are the master of your thoughts
And of your feelings
And like the explosion that propels the rocket into outer space
So your thoughts will lift you out of the gray
And into the blue sky towards the sunshine in your soul

your feelings
you
you are more than your feelings
they aren’t even a being
but you are
and yet they are feared
as if they were

look outside
outside of your feelings
and to what made them
for your thoughts did
and look outside of your thoughts
at what made them
your knowledge, your heart

for there is a vastness outside of the mind
where the mind is held all to its own
and the vastness cradles it
comforts it
gives it space
space to relax in mystery
space to not need
space to live outside of the race
a place to find the soul
it’s just outside, not inside
not bound by time nor the tool of the mind

your soul
flies free
the soul
all about love
about giving and receiving
about being one with creation
harmony

and when you go back
go back understanding
that you are in charge
in charge to let go
in charge to embrace
in charge to make space
to enjoy life
for your own focus

and then do …
focus then
on all that is love
and no matter the form it comes to you
welcome it
see through the form in which in it comes
judge it not
cast it not away
rather, seek it, drink it and accept it
for in this world
there always is good